Today is a very special day.
It is the 7-year anniversary of the day I finished the first draft of NAMELESS, back when it was still called WOMAN’S WORLD because that was the name I hurriedly gave the very first document when I was called up to dinner that first day I started working on it.
I had the idea and wrote the first few sentences in September of 2003. I don’t know how long it was when it was finished because I lost the original in a harddrive crash two years ago. I do have a copy I mailed to myself in 2006, way before I acquired my agent, but I’m not going to open it until NAMELESS is published. :-) So I can look back and see how far it’s come.
And will NAMELESS be published? Some days it is hard to imagine. I’ve been working on it so long sometimes it feels like it will never be finished. Sometimes I wonder if this is one of those stories that will never be able to piece itself together in a shape that can be published. Maybe the characters or the plot don’t quite fit together in a way that’s sellable, and never will.
But those are only fears. With every draft I see the manuscript growing stronger. Even when the problems are a pain in the ass, when the changes feel like trying to mold a new shape out of concrete, when I feel like I’m punching the manuscript in the face instead of fostering growth, I know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. I know it. It may still be a long ways off, but this book will find a home one day.
At the very least, I’m grateful for the process. All of the rewriting and waiting and thinking has bound this story to me. No matter what it will always be my first project, perhaps my favorite project. I don’t regret any of these 7 years of waiting. In fact, I might regret when it’s over.
But at the end of the journey, I will be beyond thrilled to share it with you :-) For me, that’s what today is about: marveling at how far I’ve come, and looking forward to the day it will all be worth it.
Now I’m going to go do what I’ve done for the past 7 years, and work on my book.